pffanonfandomcom-20200213-history
Baseball Phineas
Baseball Phineas is a 2010 Phineas and Ferb Go Looney Tunes cartoon (formerly Phineas and Ferb goes Looney Tunes. Plot A baseball game is going on in New York City, at the Yankee Stadium, between the visiting Texas Rainers (a play on the Texas Rangers) and the home team, the New York Yankees. The game isn't going well for the Yankees, as the Rainers - a bunch of oversized, roughneck players - aren't only dominating the Yankees, made up of veterans ("I'm only 43 and a half years old!", a joking reference to Fanny Brice's "Baby Snooks" character's catchphrase "I'm only 3 and half years old"), but intimidating the umpire by knocking him into the ground like a tent peg after an unpopular judgment. The Rainers' home runs go screaming out of the ballpark (literally) and the batters form a conga line, with each hitter knocking a ball out. Deep in the outfield, a lone fan of the Yankees is heard above the roar of the crowd. From his house, wearing a straw hat and eating a hotdog on a hot dog bun, Phineas talks trash against the Rainers, claiming that he could win the game singlehandedly with an endless barrage of home runs. He loses a bit of his bravado when he suddenly finds himself surrounded by the Rainers. His challenge is forced on him by the Rainers and, as a result, Phineas now has to play all the positions on the opposing team, including speeding from the mound to behind the plate to catch his own pitches. Furthermore, he must pick up where the Yankees left off, i.e. scoreless and down by about 96 runs. Phineas (as pitcher) first throws his fastball so hard that it zips by the opposing batter but also knocks (who has outraced the ball to home plate to be catcher as well as pitcher) off-screen and into the backstop with a loud 'crash' as he catches it. In the course of his dual role, Phineas shouts encouraging words to the "pitcher" before rushing back to the pitcher's mound to make the next pitch, then returning to home plate to catch it. Phineas then "perplexes" the Rainers with his 'slow ball', accompanied by a 'sputtering engine' sound, a gravity-defying pitch so slow that the players can't seem to connect with it. Three batters standing in line wail at it in vain, as the umpire counts "1-2-3 strikes, you're out" against each of the three in quick succession, finally ending the inning. Phineas takes his first at-bat, and selects a bat from the stack brought out by the "batboy" who literally has bat wings. Phineas starts smacking the ball as promised. On the first pitch, he makes a long hit, dashing around the bases while also showing off for the crowd, only to find a grinning Rainer holding the ball just ahead of the plate. Phineas then pulls out a pin-up poster, distracting the player and allowing Phineas to score his first run. The scoreboard now shows the Rainers as the road team, still with 96 runs, and with Phineas batting in the top of the fifth with one run so far. Bugs hits another one deep, and while rounding the bases, a Rainer ambushes the plate umpire and puts on his uniform. Phineas slides into home, obviously safe, but the fake umpire calls him out. Phineas gets in his face and argues the call, pulling his time-honored word-switching gag, resulting in the umpire declaring, "I say you're safe! If you don't like it, you can go to the showers!" Phineas gives in, but the faux-umpire gets wise too late as the board flashes another run. Phineas knocks the next pitch deep. A Gorilla comes running in, yelling, "I got it! I got it! I got it!" The ball hits him so hard in the face that it drives him under the ground, and a tombstone pops up with the epitaph "He got it". Another run appears on the board for Phineas. Phineas lines another one deep. This outfielder, who's smoking a cigar while playing the field, also takes it in the face, smashing the cigar and driving the fielder up against the fence, in front of a billboard that reads "Does your tobacco taste different lately?" (a takeoff on the Raleigh cigarette ad campaign of the war years- "Does your cigarette taste different lately? No! I smoke Raleighs!"- and a similar one for Sir Walter Raleigh pipe tobacco). Another run on the board for Phineas. Phineas hammers the next pitch on a line drive that bounces off each Rainer with a 'ping' sound as with a pinball game. The scoreboard then blinks a random series of numbers and the word "Tilted", another time-honored WB joke reference. Phineas is now pitching again and delivers a fastball at the Rainer. He hit Phineas' pitch and it seems that he just score another run. But Phineas just appeared at home base with a ball in his hand. He tag the Rainer so hard that he's knocked out and the umpire yells "Yerrr OUT!" As the Rainer is hallucinating, Phineas holds up a sign that says 'Was this trip really necessary?' Jump ahead to the final inning, announced by a radio-style jingle (What's the score, boys, what did Phineas Flynn do, what's with the Hotdog League baseball today?), with Phineas leading 96-95, the Rainer having lost a run somewhere along the way. The radio booth has also lost its original play-by-play announcer and Povenmire's voice is now heard as the announcer. With two outs in the last of the ninth, a Rainer is on base and another is up at bat, having just fashioned a bat out of a large tree and swinging it menacingly. Unintimidated, Phineas asks the audience to "watch me paste this pathetic palooka with a powerful, paralyzing, perfect, pachydermous, percussion pitch". He proceeds with a tremendous wind-up and lets the pitch go, but the ball is crushed and rockets out of the ballfield. Startled, Phineas goes chasing after it desperately, clear out of the stadium, is almost led astray by a Rainer driving a taxi, jumps out and catches a bus (where he spends the trip casually reading a newspaper and checking on the flight of the ball), goes to the top of the "Umpire State Building", climbs a flagpole, throws his glove in the air and manages to catch it before it flies far away to the Atlantic Ocean. The Rainer batter arrives by stairs just as the umpire (apparently no longer intimidated) climbs over the ledge and yells, "Yerrr OUT!" The Rainer yells back, "I'm OUT?!" to which the Statue of Liberty comes to life, saying "That's what the man said, you heard what he said, he said that!" (a popular line from a radio show, parodied as well by Rochester on the Jack Benny radio show), with Phineas echoing her words as the iris closes around Phineas. Looney Tunes drum with Phineas Flynn Instead of Isabella and "That's all, folks!", the cartoon ends with one of Phineas' rare closing appearances, popping through a drum, munching a hotdog, announcing, "And dat's de end!". This version of the drum was also seen on the previous cartoon, Hare Tonic. Category:Fanon Works Category:Unregistered Contributor Works Category:Fan-Fiction Episodes Category:Phineas and Ferb Go Looney Tunes (second version)